My cynical side says this will be a very quiet thread but you've got to give it a go.

Oh man!
I think I'm going to have to start reading a big novel - don't think I can bare to pick up a copy of the Metro for the next month!

This afternoon I thought I'd miraculously become popular as my e-mail pinged merrily away but unfortunately it was only John O'Farrell, Blair and Prescott trying to persuade me into action.

John O'Farrell starts his E-mail with "This isn't emotional blackmail. Oh all right, it is emotional blackmail, but what the hell"

He goes on

"Like me, you may not agree with everything that has happened since 1997, but come election time we cannot risk throwing away all the fantastic achievements of the past eight years. If we sit back and do nothing now, we'll be turning our backs on all the millions who've had their lives radically improved by the minimum wage or Working Families Tax Credit not to mention the millions of people in the third world who've benefited from the massive increase in overseas aid."

A convincing argument don't you think? Nah me neither

Tony Blair's automatically generated e-mail informs me

"I wanted to get this message out to you straight away about what's at stake at the election and how you can help.

We're going to need the help of every Labour supporter if you've never volunteered to help Labour's campaign before, make this your first time. If you're an old hand, we need you now more than ever.

For what's at stake on May 5 is the future direction of our country - whether it goes forward or back. Labour hasn't, by any means, achieved all we want yet. And you may not agree with every decision I have made. But there's been real progress in communities up and down the land. Our country is fairer, more modern and successful than it was eight years ago."

Nah sorry still not convinced but let's see what Prescott has to say…

Sadly the automatic bullshit filter deleted his e-mail before I had chance to read his words of wisdom so its back to sitting on my fat arse…for now.

Might have said "Vote New Labour - or I'll punch you (and eat all of your pies )"

"Like me, you may not agree with everything that has happened since 1997 ..."

Oh so that's ok then ...

Nothing much between us then, I'll just nip out and canvass for you,

Fortunately they seem to have lost my e-mail address, and I created it specially for them ..

Thanks Dickie

Nice to see you back old boy.

I've decided to go and work for a very good Labour MP and will vote for another pretty good anti-war Labour MP. I'm glad I'm not in a constituency with a pro-war MP.

Can't vote in this one (not registered in time) but I certainly wouldn't encourage anybody to vote Labour unless their candidate was, at least, anti-war. I hope Labour's majority is weakened and the Lib Dems and other anti-war parties' seats are increased so that Labour has to work with them.

having just watched question time, Michael howard is lining up a role as pantomime horse for next winter, and Kennedy is a fat knacker, and blair is a cheshire cat.

oh the injustice of it all.. please, someone normal become a politician

Heh Heh Heh ... snigger

Come to think of it - is there any politician in the world who comes across as normal?

Latest poll out today (commissioned by Sky Tv) shows:


Conservative 36%
Labour 36%
Lib Dems 21%
Other 7%

Which would still give labour a small 50 seat majority.


Asked what was the most important issue in deciding who to vote for.The public chose:

Health 41%
Immigration 40%
Crime 36%

The Iraq war came second from last with 9%

The British Nazi Party stands a good chance then ...

I heard today of a former Labour MP who defected to the Lib Dems but has now defected back and cites the fact that the Iraq war is now history and "we mustn't live in the past" amongst the reasons for the return to the fold.

The Third Riech were pretty pissed off that this attitude wasn't adopted post 1945.

John Reid on today's Today programme also made much of the fact that "surveys show" that most people are not interested any more in the Iraq war. That's because the media and our government have made sure that it's fallen off the radar.

I posted this earlier in the War in Iraq forum...

Since I live in a very safe tory seat I'll be voting Lib Dem. It's petty but it's the only way I have of truly registering my utter disgust at the way my Labour party has been hijacked by the far right.
Some women , with 200 years cumulative Labour support between them, were all saying on this mornings Today programme, how they were either voting Lib Dem or hadn't made up their minds what to do. In previous years they' like many of us I expect, had no doubt which box the cross was going into. None! You didn't have to pause for a seconds thought did you?

Yet in eight years whilst on the one hand turning things round and for the better for millions of the poor, less well off and other groups previously ignored or discriminated against by the tories, Blair has squandered all that good will through arrogance and lies.

I've now spent months wondering how I will vote in the next election and I'm angry at Blair for that alone.

Following the group interview with the women Labour supporters/members we had the dubious pleasure of an interview with the grand wizard of pomposity, the lord patron of patronisation, Dr John Ried.

Having regarded him many years ago as a socialist firebrand up to whom I should look, I now hold him beneath contempt. It would be difficult given his pronouncements on smoking bans, the Andrew Gillighan report and the Butler inquiry to imagine anybody being able to be more patronising pompus and bullying than he has been over the last three years. But today on Today he bloody managed it.
You've got to hand it to the bloke. It was an impressive display.
If for a nanosecond he thought his views and comments on the wavering Labour members mentioned earlier, the Iraq war and its aftermath, the question of Tony Blairs deception of the British public and the sense in allowing postal voting to continue in its present form in the UK were going to make me think "Oh! I was wrong all along. I must vote Labour at the next election after all" he suceeded in only one thing. Which was to confirm my belief that the country would be better off without Blair as PM and most certainly without Reid in any position of power and influence over me and people I love.
I firmly believe that every time he opens his evil mouth another old Labour supporter sighs a sad sigh and resigns themselves to voting for Charles Kennedy on May 5th.

You could tell by his reaction that discussing Iraq was the very last thing he wanted to do. They don't want the electorate thinking about it because it was an illegal war. Everybody knows it and evrybody knows Blair was at best grossly misguided and at worst duplicitous and culpable in a war crime.

The only way he and Blair could get me to vote Labour at the next election is for them both to resign.

(Edited to remove an errant apostrophe. Shame on me.)

Which is why I won't be wasting my vote on him. I have watched in utter horror at the way this Government has acted. It has treated the public with utter contempt, international law more so. They have introduced more draconian legislation than I had had nightmares about the Tories doing during their dark years of tenure. They have acted with total arrogance and derision of the people.

I groaned with disbelief when Clause 4 was dropped, and since then the party has swung further and further to the right. Whilst they may have helped some of the less well off, they're economic policy of "debt is best" is just mortgaging the future for us all.

If they've done so much damage in the last eight years, imagine what they'll have done after another four or five?

As for the others... Tories are tories, no matter how much they insist on being called Conservatives, they're tories and they're in it for their own ends - just think about the several bouts of crap we all, collectively had to deal with last time they were allowed near power. The Liberals... It might be worth considering...



and make himself and the others in the cabinate and power (HMQ included) fully accountable for their part in the illegal invasion and occupation of Iraq.

I think we need to move the Iraq war fuurther up the election agenda in whatever way possible. During the recent general election here in Denmark it was conspicious by its abscence from the debates. So some adbusters went out plastered in big bold capital letters IRAQ across all the election posters, regardless of party.

Quite right Fred. How much they fear the backlash was evidenced this morning on the Today prog by a lengthy pro labour message from Robin Cook. Clearly he feels that its time to build bridges and return to his place in the cabinet. His gently peruasive message to voters was designed to mollify those of us who think new labour should be kicked into touch and his message to TB was "We may have had our diffs over Iraq but I'd really like my well paid influential job back now. How's about it ?"

This reminds me. I must send an email to Labour HQ reminding them that we haven't forgotten and won't forgive.

Also it's worth mentioning, having in mind what Dissident was saying, that whilst Brown and Cook did fine jobs at the hands of Humphrys and Naughtie one O. Letwin came off sounding completely useless. I know we go on about how much spin is put on by the top Labour people but it still doesn't begin to compare with the utter tosh churned out by Michael Howard and his mob.

I've got a feeling that Martyn is going to be dissapointed by the outcome of this election,but then he wouldn't have it any other way,would he? Some people are born to 'oppose',and can't handle it when their party are actually in power.I honestly believe he would rather have the Tories win,at least then he would be allowed to grizzle with a clear conscience.

I've got a feeling that the klf is a jackass. I honestly believe that with some people, if given the choice, they would rather be a jackass than a non-jackass.

I would like Zippy to start his own political party. Because I want to join.

I must not employ irony when replying to the Jackass ...
I must not employ irony when replying to the Jackass ...
I must not employ irony when replying to the Jackass ...
I must not employ irony when replying to the Jackass ...
I must not employ irony when replying to the Jackass ...

I must not come out of the woodwork as soon as an election is called
I must not come out of the woodwork as soon as an election is called
I must not come out of the woodwork as soon as an election is called
I must not come out of the woodwork as soon as an election is called
I must not come out of the woodwork as soon as an election is called
I must not come out of the woodwork as soon as an election is called

Then stay in there - I'll get the spray

What was you saying about irony, Alberr ?

The latest e-mail from HQ

"Hello,

Terrible news from the Labour Party accountants. George Galloway has finally remembered to cancel his direct debit. The Labour Party badly needs money to fight this election campaign and I'm afraid the time has come to ask you for a donation.

Now we could send you a load of raffle tickets which you would never get round to selling before guiltily writing out a cheque yourself. But we thought it might save a few trees if we skipped straight to the last bit.So just look what your donation could buy:

£1 could pay for a carefully targeted mail shot to a Mr Michael Howard of Westminster.

£10 could pay for a pile of leaflets for you to leave by your front door (before finally posting one at your ward organiser's house to make him think you'd delivered the lot).

£100 could pay towards a Labour poster and we'll try not to put Michael Howard's face near where you live.

£10,000 is frankly more than you are going to give, so I don't know why we put this here.

http://Labour.org.uk/donate

But of course what you're really paying towards is the return of a Labour government:

Are you worried about global poverty?
Labour's massive increase in overseas aid is helping to improve the lives of millions in Africa.

Do you worry that giving that homeless person a pound won't change anything?
Labour has more than halved the number of people sleeping rough on our streets.

Ever given money to help look after animals?
Fox hunting will be brought back if the Tories win this election.

Do you regularly give money to the Countryside Alliance, the Campaign for Hand-Guns and UKIP?
Well, hang on, I think you're on the wrong email list.

This may not be the first email you have ever received asking for money, but at least this one isn't promising that you've already won the Nigerian Lottery. At least, I think not: I haven't checked the pledge card. But please, giving money to ensure Labour is re-elected is one of the best investments you can make. Because if you think Labour's campaign is expensive, imagine the cost of a Tory Government.

Go on do it now...

http://Labour.org.uk/donate


John O'Farrell
Author and Broadcaster

P.S. Oh and if you know any Tories, pretend that Labour is only accepting Euros, that'll really wind them up!"

Forgot the pic

tory twat with photoshop.

This is a much more amusing thread than I'd expected.

Please keep posting the O'Farrell letters. They're marvellous.

Wish I could vote....

John O'Farrell seems to have run out of jokes so Alistair Campbell has taken over.

He implores me to watch and tell my friends to watch the Labour Party political broadcast on Monday 11th April.

The guff gives 'Tony' and 'Gordon' a hearty slap on the back and then lists the times of the broadcasts.



The e-mail arrived at 23:05 on Monday 11th of April.

they aren't so stupid as you think. They know that if you had actually watched the wanking video (self love) you would have been put off bloddy voting for them!

fuck me. watch this video on 13th

A politician is an arse upon which everyone has sat except a man

The latest from John O'Farrell

Dear all,

Sometimes being a Labour Party activist can be a lonely occupation. The same few party members discussing item three on the agenda; "How can we get more people to come to meetings?" It's no different in the Cabinet; Tony Blair sits there with a handful of ministers and lots of empty chairs and says "Um, let's just give it a few more minutes and see if anyone else turns up."

But this weekend you could be one of thousands of Labour supporters across the country descending on Labour's key seats. This looks set to be an even greater mass mobilisation of political activists than the rush to join Robert Kilroy-Silk's Veritas Party. Think of Mao's long march; think of the unemployed walking from Jarrow. Your trip to South Dorset will one day rank alongside such epic treks in the history of socialism. (Every time I try and type that word the head office computer crosses it out).

etc etc etc

See you this weekend,

John O'Farrell

I'm still not exactly chomping at the bit to get out campaigning in this very safe Tory seat but I will be attending a public meeting organised by the church on Sunday to give some stick to some or all of the prospective parliamentary candidates in my constituency.

What a motley bunch they all look

 Chapman, Mark (Liberal Democrats)
 Dorries, Nadine (Conservative Party)
 Joselyn, Richard (UK Independence Party (UKIP))
 Lindsay, Martin Jonathan (Labour Party)
 Martin, Howard (Veritas)

Doesn't bode well for the Lib Dems then - Don't Call Me Mark Chapman, as Julian Cope once sang!

brilliant!

Q. What does it take to get Dickie active again?

A. One God bothering Tory bleating on about her working class roots and harping back to the glory days of Thatcherism which meant her parents could buy their council house.

1000 Labour leaflets were left on my doorstep this morning.

I hate the Tories.

Not surprisingly I have not had a similar experience ... not even an e-mail telling me who I am supposed to be canvassing for ... what is going on I ask myself, then tell myself that I couldn't care less anyway ...

Clearly I'm not that keen.

There are still 999 leaflets on my doorstep,

I did manage to deliver one to our new upstairs bathroom which I'm fairly sure I'll get time to read between now and May 5th.

Good News. There is a monster raving loonie party candidate standing in our area!

now i know who to vote for.

I googled around and found my prospective Labour MP, still no news from my own party ... never heard of her before ... there is absolutely no information of what her policies are in respect of foundation hospitals, student top up fees or the war ... will be voting against the Tories and probably voting for the Green candidate ... what a mess!

Some quotes from BBC News item Brian Sedgermore

Even I have heard of Brian, a Labour Party veteran who served twenty seven years as a Labour MP and was, like many others who don't agree with Tony and his gang, very loyal to our party,


Tony Bliar, '... aren't particularly interested in someone they have never heard of ...'

Two Jags, '"Whoever heard of Brian before?"

Little shits ...

Brian Sedgemoor, '"I urge everyone from the centre and left of British politics to give Blair a bloody nose at the election and to vote for the Lib Dems in recognition of the fact that the tawdry New Labour project is dead," he said. "The Tories have no chance of winning the election so the bogeyman Howard argument is just an Aunt Sally, easily put up and more easily knocked down."

Prescott is probably a bit distracted this morning after all he does have a load of Greenpeace activists sitting on the roof of his house threatning to install solar panels.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/vot...and/4484395.stm

Actually I thought they were pretty arrogant and also very dangerous people ... considering his wife is protected by armed police it must have been terrifying to wake up to people clambering over her roof without hindrance ... she should have insisted on a ASBO at least ...

It seems to me that these days security in this country largely involves police officers in cute hats shouting sternly, 'Get down!' (from Big Ben, Buckingham Palace, Prescott's roof, you name it), and occasionally, despite themselves, adding hopefully, '...Please?'



I've been gone for a month to lands armed to the teeth. It's great to be back. Those guys would be dead if they'd tried that in D.C.

What were you doing in Dagenham?

Prescott's house ... HOUSE?

Looks like a blooming castle ...

An Englishmans home is his...

We had the VeritARSE leaflet through the door last night and it is hilarious (and fabulously hypocritical)
Obviously a fan of "traditional family values" - he's divorced with 3 kids and. despite standing for a party that want to leave the EU and all that goes with it. Has been living and working in GERMANY for the last 8 years, something he wouldn't have been able to do as easily were it not for the bloody EU!!